Wil Wheaton (album​-​single)

by Crystal Wolf

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This album is just one song. Please click on the individual song if you'd like to pay less than $.50. :)


released September 10, 2013

Lyrics by Crystal Wolf, Chris Canary, and Daniel (gundo) Gunderson. Music by Crystal Wolf



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Crystal Wolf Indianapolis, Indiana

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Track Name: Wil Wheaton
Verse 1:
I played d&d in the eighties
when we fought in the red box wars
I’ve still got copies of board games
That aren’t even on ebay anymore
We were playing Magic the [D]gathering
Way back in 1993
And I was in love with Barbara Eden
Back when genie was on black and white tv


I loved Wil Wheaton
In the first season
Of the next generation
And I enjoyed the star wars prequels
For 100 reasons, with no reservations
I recall when it was said that Scientology was nothing more
Than a barroom bet
And I’ll elicit your fangirl squee
Cause I’m the coolest uncool person that you’ve met.

You know -- I was blogging before blogging was blogging
I RPG’d on bulletin boards
And I’ll give mad props to Garfunkel and Oats
but I’ll play ukulele ‘till my hands are sore.
I had a Geocities page back in the day
Your mountain dew was my grape Faygo
I chatted with people who used complete sentences
And I know the difference between FASERIP and THAC0

(Repeat Chorus)

Bridge: I see some of you looking crazy
Cause you don’t know what half of this stuff is
And some of the rest of you are nodding your heads
‘cause you’ve watched Doctor Who since you were little kids.
Every con is a family reunion
But some of us are cousins twice removed
And the whole point of this
Slightly pretentious song is to say
I know I’m not geekier than you.
Even though…